I remember back in the 1970s when the movie “10″ with Bo Derek first came out. She had her hair braided in cornrows which was the first time I had seen the style on a white women. I didn’t actually see the film, but saw the ads and Bo’s pictures everywhere. I remember that she was celebrated for being a beautiful woman, but when she came out with her black girl cornrows and beads, she became a goddess to untold millions of white men. Back in those days, posters were all the rage, and women like Bo Derek became millionaires just by having creative control over the posters that they did. Bo Derek had that exotic thing going on with her braids and no doubt sold millions of her posters. BTW, it was her husband who encouraged her to get the style he saw on the sisters in LA.
Ironically, during that same time period, I also remember reading in Essence Magazine I think, about black women who started showing up at work in the beautiful cornrow styles. Not surprisingly, the same style that was so beautiful and exotic on Bo Derek, was considered unkempt and unprofessional on black women in corporate America, no matter how conservatively the braids were done. Sisters who were stewardesses, or who had broken in to corporate America were now being harassed or even being fired for daring to show up at work wearing the cornrow hairstyle.
The more things change, the more they stay the same. These days, we see a change in things only in that white women are more aggressive in going for what they desire. And whatever Lola wants, Lola gets, and what she wants is your lips and hips my sisters! And believe me, the more you start rocking out your nappy hair with pride, Lola will show up with afro wigs to copy that too! I’m just sayin’, no disrespect intended. After all, how many white girls are plumping their lips and getting those Brazilian butt lifts? This is not even news anymore. It has become the normal way of things.
But at the same time, many of us are struggling to love our features… still! We still feel certain ways about our full lips, round noses, brown skin and kinky hair. Everywhere we look, there’s hardly an affirmation of our beauty in it’s natural state. We have to first straighten the hair and lighten the skin. Then we can be considered, and we still will lose. It’s a losing game if you look at from the oppressor’s perspective. Even white women are losing most of the time.
When I sits still and meditate on this thing, it’s a trip to me that we black women have to “make peace” with our features, one at a time! At least I did, and it took a couple of decades! It seems like a schizo kind of thing that women in general want each others features!! So strange, but it’s their plan, really, to keep women off balance and mentally enslaved and fighting desperately to attain a false reality of “beauty”. Especially black women.
But I have a question for you. How about what WE think? Do we feel that our features look better on white women? Like Angelina Jolie’s full lips. or Kim Kardashian’s big booty. Or Bo Derek’s braids in long blonde hair, no extensions. Does black women’s features on white women look more beautiful and “exotic”?
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The answer to your question is no…they don’t look “better.” Bo Derek’s face and hair look mismatched. When not carefully airbrushed, Jolie’s lips look lumpy. Kardashian, who’s an Armenian and almosty technically a WoC (though your mileage may vary), looks like she got oversized implants.
And don’t get me started on tanning. I mean, hello…they’ve got tanning lotions called friggin’ “Brown Envy.”
What we’re seeing right now is all the more reason why black women need to embrace our features and hairstyles more than ever, and continue to call out every thief and fetishist who would utter double-speak about our hair being unkempt and our bodies being morbidly obese.
If it looks good on them, then it must look phenomenal on us – that’s the new rule.
Like the singer Pink once said, imitation isn’t flattering; it’s annoying.
“…What we’re seeing right now is all the more reason why black women need to embrace our features and hairstyles more than ever…”
Thank God that is just what we ARE doing!
You know, you’re right about Angelina’s lips, those ARE some nasty puckered thangs, and as for Kim’s butt, it keeps morphing before our very eyes! And concerning Bo Derek, she was honest when she was on Oprah earlier this year and said her hubby saw the cornrow style on sisters. Obviously fetishing, he had her put the style in her own hair. Not to be crude, I can only imagine what he did to her when looking at those braids…
BTW, they’ve been envious of brownness since day one, it’s just that now, the exploiters know it and are coming out with the products, which fly off the virtual shelves! HA!
Obviously fetishing, he had her put the style in her own hair. Not to be crude, I can only imagine what he did to her when looking at those braids…
Ewwwwwwwwwww.
I know, sister, but this man was THIRTY years older than Bo, and was famous for the women he married. And she was his fourth woman, after Ursula Andress, Linda Evans and some other woman.
And according to wiki he took pictures for playboy mag of the last three (at different times) and directed them in movies.
So he was a fetishing weirdo when it came to women.
They dont do it to get closer to God.
bullshit god created us the way he wanted us to look. we have it the white media only tries to brainwash people into thinking just what u said . i bet u wouldn’t have said that 5o yr ago. plant that seed in someones head that don’t know any better. where i come from we knw whose the queen the dark nations. u should be barred to even give advice.
corn rolls they never want to give any props to a black women BO Derick ,and she was proud to milk that title,hypocrite.i bet a black women braided her hair. BO bitch took all the credit for that and never gave a shout out on the air to the stylist what was that french braids,.they want little white girls to think brads come from France.big butt j-lo Mary j was out before her come on people. this is to brain wash little white boy and girls.our black kids and Hispaniola kids know the truth.big lips no beautiful full lips, that are actually lips, white people and some other races just have a face with an opening in it that they call lips. most of them don’t have lips come on people .white women have been drawing on the out side of the whole in the face putting lip stick on for years faking they have lips . their very smart people they plant a seed and everyone believes. for example i can tell u your dress is ugly all night u would believe it .why/ because i planted the seed.some people might hate my comment. i’m not racist but someone has to recognize the truth.media that’s their job to convince u into believing in what they believe. i bet most people think Jesus was white no matter how many times the bible says his hair was as wool and his skin was copper. see media. knowledge is power baby bye.this probably wont air because u want to be right and if free speech isn’t what u think it should be no one will get this will they.if they do your honest and u know the truth. one thing i despise is a liar and that i’m not. i can back anything i say.P.S your right Angelina lips look nasty. Kim’s butt media look at her mom sister even khole come on her as is too round .But media and money planting the seed.now J-LO that was hers she even got a butt reductions .at the time when she first came out the media mad her feel insecure about her but just like in the old days .when they featured black films they put big lips nappy braid hair big buts. know 30 years later when white women get them oomph they look better than the people that were born with it. 20 years from now watch how their nose will change.they already killing themselves getting tanned.body builders cant even go on stage with a pale body.. black women don’t even have to wear make-up like white women.if white women don’t wear make up they look just like their men.example. have u ever seen the kardashian women on any b every hills house wife without make up. no but the Atlanta housewives don’t have their make up on. .the media HAS BEEN BRAIN WASHING LITTLE GIRLS AND BOYS OF ALL RACES TO THINK WHITES IS BEAUTIFUL but look how their butchering themselves .how many black women get breast implants. hardly any white women have always wanted to be top dog. but its a new decade Marilyn Monroe look is dead women of color from all around the world is in this country and we see true beauty every day
why its not offensive
Middle Easterners can have wool hair and dark skin tones..it is not a definite evidence of someone big black.
And lipsticks were created to give women color on their lips that resembles flowers,not to make them thick. Red lips mean fertile and healthy….the main point of lipsticks.
And you sound bitter and insecure.
The middle easterners I see have straight black hair. No wool whatsoever.
If by wooly, you mean curly then people from every race have curly hair.
OK.
lmaooo yo thank you sis for making me aware of a tanning lotion called brown envy wow. that is ill, i posted the picture with a few words on facebook. for those who dont like being black.
Boo…they get even weirder. Like “Black Beauty” and “White to Black.” Just Google them, or browse them on Amazon.
Makes you scratch your head and wonder who the hell names these things.
White to Black?!!? Are you serious?
I did a post on the skin color issues in India and how they are marketing “Fair and Handsome” to the MEN!
They already got all the women, but greed makes them go for the men.
Anyway, they market these products with names like Refined White, Absolute White and Cyber White EX. skin color
The irony is that people are too easily duped, one way or the other.
Tanning does not mean they want to be black and the people who do believe tanning means they want to be black are delusional. Black people are not the only ones with dark skin and plus they (most people who tan) try to obtain an olive skin tone, which is not brown.
I do not know if you know this but tanning is a natural process…and tanning lotions are the purpose of making people look like they see sun and actually go outside. To not be so pale.
Angelina Jolie’s lips are REAL….look at her childhood pictures. I personally know many white women with natural full lips. And full lips make women look you her hence why they digest full lips.
Full lips make women look younger*
Henry, these women want to look black. But without looking black. It’s some psychological stuff, Henry. We black folks come in a range of colors, with the lightest of light to the darkest of dark. The lightest of light are considered black by most western standards. White people, generally speaking, have serious issues with being so white colored, or so thin lipped. It is what it is.
No, they do not want to be or look black. Middle Easterners, Native Americans, Southeast Asians, Eastern Asians, Indians and many more also range in skin colors that include tan and dark skin tones. I am sorry but you would have to be very self centered to think they want to be or look black when tan skin is natually available to many other races and ethnicities as well.
OK.
Geishas put on white makeup on their skin because that was/is their idea of beauty, not because they wanted to be white. They have celebrated white skin for thousands of years even before they ever saw white people. Again, they put in white makeup not because they wanted to be white but because they see white skin as beautiful.
Even during the Victorian era in Europe. White skin was the ideal and people put on white powder on their faces. So they do to have serious issues with being white.
Look at A list actresses and talented ladies such as Christina Hendricks, Cate Blanchett, Anne Hathaway, Amanda Seyfreid, Fanning sisters, Dita Von Teese, Kat Dennings and Jessica Chastain who do not have issues with their ivory skins.
OK.
I don’t think anyone should discredit any type of beauty. It’s time to embrace the beauty of being a women for ourselves rather than letting the world or man dictate to us what makes us beautiful. I grew up in a prodomimetly white community and wore weaves and fake hairs to embrace the beauty I saw in my white peers. On top of that my half sisters were half white and I constantly envied there interracial hair and skin tones and features. It wasn’t until I was a senior in high school that I redefined what I believed what beautiful. This is because my grandfather passed away and had always referred to me as his African Queen. I’m just saying its not delusional to believe that someone would want to be black or want to be white we want to be whatever Maxims top 100 says is beautiful at the time. Women are a god given gift that burrow there ways into the hearts of men causing them to feel emotions only a women could make a man feel. I’m not saying every woman should go natural but embrace your essence and who you truly are and blessings will follow.
“I don’t think anyone should discredit any type of beauty. It’s time to embrace the beauty of being a women for ourselves rather than letting the world or man dictate to us what makes us beautiful.”
I couldn’t agree more.
“It wasn’t until I was a senior in high school that I redefined what I believed what beautiful. This is because my grandfather passed away and had always referred to me as his African Queen.”
I am glad your grandfather helped you to reach that confidence.
First and foremost, as a human being, I’m astounded at what I’m reading on this blog! How is this sort of discussion any less RACIST and UGLY as what Caucasians put up on (edited), (edited) or any of those other RACIST, RACIALIST sites?
As a woman of Afro-Caribbean descent, I am appalled at the disparaging of the VERY SAME FEATURES that we, as women of colour, have been denigrated about BECAUSE THEY ARE ON “WHITE WOMEN”!
How does this make ANY sense? How is this not SHAMEFUL? The “white” woman has no more-or less- control over the features she was born with than women of colour, so why go off on Angelina Jolie’s lips? Or Bo Derek? yes, the element of fetishising is present (as has been the case with cultural appropriation), but what about people of African descent torturing their hair by “straightening” it? what of the myriad skin “toning” products bleaching the skin? C’mon! The horror of colonisation goes both ways and though critique is appropriate, this dehumanisation of the “other” does not reflect very well on those who choose this route.
justice on any level is NEVER achieved through the humiliation or belittling of the “other” or perpetrator of the injustice.
in other words, don’t become the thing you hate.
peace out.
I didn’t go off on Angelina’s lips, but they are ugly, not because they are big but because they’re ugly. My opinion, take it or leave it.
But my opinion is not what is dehumanizing. If anything, white women (or any women) who rush to get these surgeries are dehumanising themselves! And my thing is that women have to love themselves AS GOD CREATED US! Despite anyone’s opinion of it, because others’ opinions being taken at a higher value is what drives people to change themselves. I’m about self acceptance, and anyone who reads my blog regularly knows that about me. White women ought not participate in getting this stuff done to themselves just to satisfy fetishing from white men, or black men for that matter!
This post is a question to black women: Do WE think that our features on white women look more beautiful? The question is a legitimate one, because our black features on white women are celebrated to high heaven, and we can see that everytime we look at how Kim Kardashian’s career has blown up!
It became PC for whites to openly celebrate these black features when Jennifer Lopez first became famous, although she is Latina.
Jennifer was the catalyst and the compromise–being that she’s not black, yet she has the big booty that has always been fetishized from the days of slavery, from the days of the “Hottentot Venus”.
I would even venture to say that her career blew up BECAUSE of her body type. She allowed them to be able to come out of the “fetish closet” so to speak.
So I ask the question to my sisters, and to any woman who is able to honestly and objectively assess what’s going on here. Any woman who is paying attention to beauty trends. Do our black features look better on white women, Pilka?
i look at features independent of race. i look at shapes, bone structure, proportions….i draw badly, so i stare more, look closely at people…their faces…i live in New York City so i see –& hear–ALL types of people: it’s WONDERFUL!!! I love it!
if i find someone attractive, i photograph that person.
i think a person is attractive if they are attractive, regardless of their race.
Beauty is beauty, whether on the physique of a woman of African, Asian, Latin American, or white descent.
if our features look good on us, why would they look horrid on another race, so long as the proportions are right?
what does that say about us if we say that these putatively “Black” features look good only on us.
o really?!?
why?
does this mean there is a
and this might piss you off, but I LIKE it when the whole race/look expectation is jumbled up.
makes life more interesting & fun.
sorry if this can’t satisfy you, i just can’t think this way.
this “does
that is not to say i don’t notice if a person who is not of African descent has certain features ATTRIBUTED to black people: years ago, I worked as a telephone interviewer, and one of the surveys required Vietnamese speakers. Don’t you know, one of the young women there, she could have passed for Black & it was great! She was really hot! Beautiful woman. I was amused & thought, well it’s only normal, after all EVERYONE comes from Africa….
and began to drift in my mind about migration. I saw slides in mind of different peoples in Africa, how some with very dark skin had “Asian” eyes. or the slope of their faces were Asiatic.
On a more serious note, though, how is it edifying to denigrate these women whom you *think* had surgery to enhance their assets? seriously?!?
what if god indeed gave them their kinky hair, large derriere, or other physical attributes deemed ” black” , where does that leave you & your comments? how is what you are saying or asking any less hurtful?
As for Angelina Jolie, she was mercilessly teased for her lips as a teen. too big too big too big.
make you happy?
How many people ready to pounce and say how “hideous” “mushy” Angelina’s lips are, would cry “racist!” if the same were applied to Erykah Badu’s luscious lips? please! they would be right to do so IF the criticism stemmed from being an observation based on her race.
on the same basis it is equally wrong to diss these women.
Now, don’t get me wrong, i DO understand where you’re coming from, really, & I’ve checked other blog entries of yours I really really relate to. it’s just on this one, I think the trauma of being battered by an unsympathetic (in many many ways) fashion/media industry can derail one into being a bit cruel…we ARE underrepresented, our beauty continuously under attack(remember that Japanese racist charlatan, Satoshi Kanazawa, who not so long ago claimed Black women were less attractive! the gall!!!)…so I understand the sentiment.
& believe me, I do get the point you’re making that once something “crosses over” into the dominant culture it becomes “cool” , “sexy”, “hip” where before it was something else….& not good.
but this phenomenon-which is VERY different from genuine interest in a culture outside one was born in- is not exclusive to beauty/style/fashion, but to other aspects of culture as well- music. food. language.
Cultural appropriation.
Pilka, you’ve got me confused with someone else.
I don’t think black features look horrid on other races. I asked if we think they look BETTER, not worse! But beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Angelina’s lips are ugly to me, not because they are big but because they puckered! I don’t like puckered! My preference and Im entitled to it. Of course in airbrushed pictures they look gorgeously smooth!
As for pissing me off with your opinion, I get the feeling that you think you got me figured out. You don’t.
And as for denigrating women that I *think* got surgery, as I said before, Kim’s butt keeps morphing. Its shape keeps subtly changing, because she keeps getting work done. They can’t make it look exactly the same each time. Kim had a beautiful figure before, I’ve seen numerous pictures of her. Now she just look out of proportion.
As for your comment:
…”what if god indeed gave them their kinky hair, large derriere, or other physical attributes deemed ” black” , where does that leave you & your comments? how is what you are saying or asking any less hurtful?…”
Just asking about these features would only be hurtful if the person believed the dominant cultural lie that these features are ugly. But I love asking probing, provocative questions just to stir the brain juice and jumble it all up, so to speak.
As for your comment about me being happy about Angelina being teased as a child, her teasing speaks to the cultural double standard of ridiculing the features while desiring them. I was pointing that out. I don’t hate Angelina, but admire her humanitarian work and her boldness, and love that she charts her course, despite what anyone thinks!
My previous post was about nappy hair white girls. If you carefully read what I wrote, you’ll see that I complimented the beauty of the kinky haired white girls and compared it favorably with the kinky haired black girls and called them both mirror images of beauty!!
See, Pilka, I actually believe that black features ARE beautiful, and look beautiful on other races when it comes naturally. There is this Japanese singer who has black features and is stunningly beautiful. Her name is Koda Kumi. She did a photo with bronze body makeup and had me fooled. She was wearing an African gele and african print clothing, and I thought she was black. She was gorgeous! But I also believe that our black features look phenomenally stunning on us! We do black features better than any other race!
Sistah gyal…I knew this post would draw in at least one troll.
I love trolls because they are so trollesque–so low to the ground and stuff. That’s when I can get my shovel and scrape them up from the ground and into my compost heap where they can do me service! HA!
This question is difficult to work with, simply because, who’s to say that they are “black features”? I was born with a generous derriere and a full pouty lip, and I am as pale as anyone from northern Europe can be. In the same way, I wouldn’t say that a woman from Africa born with naturally silky hair or a narrow nose has “white features.” Would you? Simply because, well, they are African, and their features are their features. That is all that can be said. As you might be inclined to call me a white woman with “black features,” I would prefer to consider myself a white woman with uncommon features, as that is what I AM. Generalizing can only work against us on this topic.
Additionally, you mentioned Kardashian, who is from a so-called “white” race (Armenian) that is known for their generous derrieres. Again, proving that these features that you call “black” are not limited to the black race! Not even to mention Latinas, such as Ms. Lopez. Most black women have smaller derrieres than I do (when compared with black women who share the same waist line), although I admit that it is even rarer to find in the “white” population, it is definitely not something that can be deemed black and black only. What was already naturally theirs (J-Lo and Kim), you are right, they knowingly and deliberately try to enhance and exaggerate… but it is not that they are going after what “is not theirs”; they are enhancing what they already have. Although I am personally against these kinds of things, I just wanted to state that they are bad examples to support your point of white people trying to obtain “black features.” And about Bo’s braids? For crying out loud, it is just a freaking hair style! Now I could see how her having her hair in braids for years would be a little strange (as braids are not meant for fine hair), but what is wrong with trying something different every once in a while? A hair style is not plastic surgery. I just returned from a long trip in Kenya, where the local people encouraged me to try braids. I did, and I get a lot of compliments on them…NOT because they look good on me (because, common, my hair is fine and braids will always look better in thick hair), but because it was DIFFERENT. People enjoy seeing changes every once in a while and, if it works, people find it interesting that you can pull it off! I am able to pull it off, so people find it interesting! So, I do not think that it is a matter of “black features looking better on white people” but more a matter of what is unique! What is uncommon. This goes for Jolie’s lips, Lopez’s derriere, Bo’s braids…. and all the people of other races who have anything that is typically not frequently found among others of their own race.
But I DO understand your frustration for those who TRY to own attributes that are not their own. But that goes for EVERYONE of EVERY race. Why can’t people just be themselves? But it should never come to the point where we say “Hey, what are they doing with MY features!?” Um, since when were they YOURS? How can you even begin to question “do our black features look better on white women”? It is very appalling and self-appraising of you to call them “black features,” just as I think any feature commonly loved by the media and deemed by the media as “white” is just as foolish and self-exalting. Although some races TEND to have one characteristic more often than another, there is an exception to every rule and so, therefore, can no longer be “rule.” So, bottom line here is that I think the question is a bit shallow, too generalizing, and silly to a certain degree.
Welcome timarieg!
This IS a hard question. Your answer starts: “…who’s to say that they are ‘black features’?”
As a black woman, I’m to say they are black features. When I look around at black women in my California neighborhood, or when I meet black women from around the world and see those same features, logic brings me to that conclusion. That’s not to say that others with black features are black, but the features are.
You also say in your answer: “…but it is not that they are going after what “is not theirs”; they are enhancing what they already have. Although I am personally against these kinds of things, I just wanted to state that they are bad examples to support your point of white people trying to obtain ‘black features’.”
I say that my example perfectly makes the point that, because J Lo is NOT black, she was a safer person for white america to celebrate for having the black feature of a big butt, which has been clandestinely fetishized by whites for centuries. You have to re-read what I wrote to understand what point I was truly making, timarieg. Anyway everybody knows that most Puerto Ricans have varying degrees of African ancestry in their bloodlines.
Another of your statements: “…As you might be inclined to call me a white woman with “black features,” I would prefer to consider myself a white woman with uncommon features, as that is what I AM. Generalizing can only work against us on this topic.”
Black features are not uncommon, timarieg, they are very common to the vast majority of black peoples of the world! I’m being very specific, and your calling your features “uncommon” is a false generalization!
“I say that my example perfectly makes the point that, because J Lo is NOT black, she was a safer person for white america to celebrate for having the black feature of a big butt, which has been clandestinely fetishized by whites for centuries…Anyway everybody knows that most Puerto Ricans have varying degrees of African ancestry in their bloodlines.”
Anna Renee:
I agree that J-Lo likely has African ancestry and I acknowledge that her celebrated butt can be attributed to that. But when you say those traits are “clandestinely fetishized by whites,” please elaborate. I am white and I don’t mind admitting these traits common to “African beauty” are attractive. Which whites are you referring to?
I’m referring to those whites who were fetishists of a black woman’s features, but would never admit it. You seem to be a man who simply considers black women beautiful, without being ashamed that you do.
I don’t think the ones who don’t admit it, but just keep quiet about it, are that bad. The ones who annoy me are the racist types, who blatantly say they don’t like African features, but then say Vanessa Williams is beautiful because she looks European. Does she really look European or they in denial?
Yes, I agree the racists are the worst, especially when they know they are attracted to black women or black features. It’s all so strange, newyorkman. People should be able to like what they like without having to hide behind racism.
Cont.. @timarieg:
“…People enjoy seeing changes every once in a while and, if it works, people find it interesting that you can pull it off! I am able to pull it off, so people find it interesting!”
Timarieg, What would you say to a black woman who wants to “pull off” simply being able to wear her kinky curly hair in its natural state, but being told by society that she looks unkempt? Do you have any words of wisdom for that black woman?
“…And about Bo’s braids? For crying out loud, it is just a freaking hair style! Now I could see how her having her hair in braids for years would be a little strange…”
NO, timarieg, it’s NOT just a freaking hair style! In a country that overtly and covertly denounces black African beauty, in a country where black women and men are trained from birth to hate a black woman’s beauty, a cornrow hairstyle back in the time of Bo Derek was a fierce political statement for a black woman–of unshackling the chains of self hatred and mental slavery—sort of like fat white women boldly stepping out of self hatred and into fashion and dressing in bold colors and flaunting their fat beauty, in spite of hate from society!
Now timarieg, you can see that I know a lot more about being a black woman and the politics of our black beauty than you. But, because of social conditioning (if you are american), you as a white woman probably with a knee jerk, won’t be able to accept what I have just taught you. This is unfortunate for the vast majority of white americans, because it “dumbs them down”, to quote Lisa Simpson from The Simpsons cartoon.
But it is possible that you, with my “fat white woman” analogy will be able to make the comparison, thus better understanding the black women who you have so much in common with. I can tell that you are one of the intelligent ones of your race, with a better grasp, not like so many of the others.
Once again, you are soooo right about this question of black beauty.
It was deemed Black and Black only for 400 years until the white race figured out how to get one. Now everyone wants to claim it’s part of their race because it’s okay to finally admit what the Black women has had for centuries is truly hot!
pilka I completely agree with you! Some of the photos above are of women born with those traits. Like the little girl with the full head of curls! I hate to tell you but people of irish descent especially tend to had ridiculously thick, heavy curls that can rival the tightness of African hair. I’ve broken combs in the hair of some of my friends with hair like this. Another good friend of mine in high school was of Jewish descent – Israel born parents – His hair grew into a dark black cloud naturally.
I’m personally multi racial. We are Native American, European (Wales, France, England and Scotland), Moroccan, Spanish and my oldest is half Chinese on top of it all! I was born with white blonde hair and green eyes but I’ve always had a “tan” and without the help of tanning lotions, I would turn a deep brown if I stayed outside. I have full lips though my mouth isn’t wide and I’ve had hips and a butt since puberty smacked me in the face. I’m not talking a size two butt with size 0 waist either. If not for my butt I could fit into a size 10… I’m wearing 16′s that are WAY too loose for my waist.
Butt, hips and lips aren’t just an African trait. I’ve seen a few Russian woman with killer curves and they are WHITE. What about the vast majority of latino women out there? Last time I checked J-lo didn’t get a butt implant and Angelina’s lips are natural.
You talk about how you should appreciate your bodies then turn around and degrade women born with similar traits. Get some photos of women that have had these procedures… like octomom! We are all women! All of us are being force fed what we should look like. While those of darker complexions are being told to lighten their skin and straighten their hair, white women are told they have to go dark and be sticks with balloons on our chests to impress men. Celebrities are just perpetrating this! they get paid to look how “society” wants them to. It is our choice as women to NOT follow the lead. To stand up and be proud of what we have and support other women to be proud of what they have. NOT to tear each other apart and definitely not fall back on racial criticism. Bo Derek’s hubby and the producers that held her paycheck in the balance wanted her hair that way. She did it. She made money. It was a hairstyle. How do you know she didn’t thank her stylists?
I might not be a full blooded european, native or african but seriously people… Even I can see when things being said need to be looked at with a skeptical eye.
Though your post was written over a year ago I would like to thank you for your lovely words. We as women do not get to pick our bodies, our hair, eye color, skin color, nothing. I don’t think Black women are any less beautiful than Caucasian, Asian, Native American…you name it. What is all this ugliness from within? I am Caucasian, and a bit of Native American. Possible some African American? My body looks more like a black woman’s than a white woman’s. I had to learn to love myself as is.
I believe the reason that Black American women hate the white race is because they are taught hatred in their homes. Period. The majority of white women DO NOT hate black women. That’s a lie. I have never once heard a white woman say anything derogatory about a black woman’s body.
Again Pilka, I would like to thank you for your lovely words. I wish every black woman would copy this and paste them on to their bathroom
mirror.
mirror. God created us all.
Actually what you think is just that, what you think, doesn’t make it a fact! The descendants of African slaves, is what we really are, but we are taught we are black, think about it, we are not black, but the Caucasian race taught us that we are? Our features are beautiful, but what no one seems to mention that often is that the Caucasian media teaches us to hate our exotic features and beautiful shades, all the while figuring desperately trying to create what God gave us naturally.
What I meant to say is all the while trying desperately to create what God gave us naturally at my earlier post.
As a African American I have had countless experiences and conversations with other African Americans, never have I ever heard a family or parent teaching their child to hate themselves. The real hatred comes from the white race, just check your white history.
Greetings Sista Westsiiiide:
Methinks Angie (whom I think is very beautiful & that’s mainly because of the good stuff: sexiness, intelligence, humanity that comes shooting from her eyes) got her looks & lips honestly. Check pictures of her father Jon Voight in his youthful acting days (he had some bee-stung soup-coolers for a white man!) & her late mom, Marcheline Bertrand, whom I think was part French-Indian. Angie very much resembles her. I say this to say that I don’t think her lippage was manufactured but something she inherited genetically.
However, with very few exceptions, Black features do indeed look mo betta on BLACK people, and the same could be said of white features looking so much better on white people & not on black folks who go under the knife to ‘Europeanize” their God-given features!
One.
Yes, she got those lips from her father! I’ve seen pictures of her in her teens and she had the look then. I can’t help but wonder if she was teased because of it by her friends while growing up.
But we black women have to continue to learn to accept our features and I know it’s a process. We can’t depend on the greater society to acknowledge and uplift our beauty. The irony is that the same industry that disparages our features on us, is the same one that idolizes our features on others! It’s madness!
So I ask the question to provoke us to think about this irony.
ONE LOVE!
Yes, my Sistuh! Amen! I’m reminded of my kidhood, how it was always us or one of us who would clown one of our own kind if they were perceived as “too dark,” “too black,” hair “too nappy” or had “buckshots”… nose too wide, ass too big, etc. etc. etc. And it’s sad because we weren’t ( and some of us still aren’t) celebrating US, the unique beauty of US, the diversity & flavas & wonderful differences within the community of US!
One.
The single most beautiful woman that I have ever laid eyes on was a woman of color.
it really is nothing short of amazing when black people begin to question some of the things white people say or/and do and our own people get not offended but highly offended. almost to the point that i believe they would do physical harm on behalf of white people. now i have white associates or/and friends but would never become there defender when my own people ponder or question some of the things they do or say.
i truly over-stand the post. do black features look better on whites ? why ask that question ? its because black or/and black features are not the standard of beauty here in america and else where. but it is the standard that the very same people who have helped make it NOT standard are attempting to obtain. lmaoooooo this ish is funny as hell.
Not only is it funny as heyel, but it’s also a touch of pure madness.
i truly over-stand the post.
“Over-stand”? Took me a minute, but now that I get it…stealing it!
its because black or/and black features are not the standard of beauty here in america and else where. but it is the standard that the very same people who have helped make it NOT standard are attempting to obtain.
Bingooooooo!
Wow! This is a topic that gets you to thinking. My answer is no.
Right Answer!
To answer the question, no, it doesn’t look better. For the sake of full disclosure, I am a white man. I respect and appreciate beauty in all varieties of women and I find African-descended women with natural/unaltered African features attractive. Like I said, I appreciate all kinds of beauty, but natural beauty (not surgically modified) is what I am talking about. Whether a woman is of African, Asian, European or any other heritage, I think it is much better she embrace the features she is born with.
By the way, Jennifer Lopez very likely has some African ancestry, which would probably explain where she got her booty from. Wouldn’t it be constructive to acknowledge that?
I really don’t care about who prefers what on whom. I think if black women want to be appreciated for their looks, then they have to take better care of their looks. This means
1) Eating healthy (yes it shows when you do in complexion, and overall glow),
2) Exercising – this not only helps to lose weight and gives you feminine, taut curves, but it also improves the complexion, hair, nails. I work out regularly and radiate health. Most people notice this.
3) They need to wear make up and wear it well. Wearing make up is very feminine, it adds a touch a refinement and most men find women who wear it more attractive than those who don’t. Plus it enhances your features. It can make eyes pop in a beautiful way or your complexion glowy with the right blush. Learn how to make it look subtle and natural.
4) Wear your own hair. Weaves looks awful and they look like short-cuts to true health and beauty. You can have nice, thick, healthy neck length hair that is very appealing because of how it’s styled and its fullness, touchability, and bounce. Long hair is not a requirement for beauty but healthy, clean hair is – as well as a classy looking style. A lot of black women like afro-american styles which are very unappealing to men. Look up sophisticated styles for women and it should help give you an idea of what most men would fine attractive.
5) Learn how to speak well. Speaking well shows refinement.
6) Stop wearing tight, revealing clothes, or unclassy attire- This is annoying to most men and it is not only cheap and distasteful because it makes you appear undesirable because you are on display. Men like what is protected, not advertized to all. Men prefer women who can and want to look desirable without showing much because they appear to have more dignity as a woman and they value themselves enough to keep their goods exclusive.
Being clothed modestly and attractively takes intelligence because you need to know what qualities clothes are, the right colors and the right fit for your body type in a way that preserves integrity, creates interest and enhances your looks. Modesty is actually most sexy. Not frumpy and homely but conservative classy. All men like this look because it’s sophisticated and wholesome and sexy by accident not being you’re making an effort to be.
7) Be down to earth and polite – shows good grooming and the appealing to groom children.
8) Stop having babies out of wedlock. There is no better way to say “I’m low prole” than to having babies unmarried. You’re used goods to most desirable men. Sorry but it’s true.
Only seven Tina? LOL Thanks for your comments.
I do not like Tina’s comments. She has a few good points, but everything she talks about it is what men like. What about what a women likes. We are in a time where people have different relationships. It’s not about what men like. Women need to love and be comfortable with themselves. I’m sick and tired of women trying to do things to impress a man. Do what makes you feel good and happy, stop worrying about what some man thinks. Personally, I don’t wear make-up. I am a good looking women without that stuff on my face. That’s the way GOD made me. I have never had any problems attracting men or all races. I don’t do anything to impress them. I do what I feel and it works for me.
I find it insane in todays world to say that these features belong only to African American Women! If we want racism to end and sterotypes than we should stop acting like this, its ridiculous. No one is trying to steal anything from anyone, women just want to look good, possibly their best, but to say that someone cant braid their hair because its a black girl thing is untolerable in 2011. Style is there for everyone to try, no one owns a particular style. Anyone would look better if you pick and choose all the traits you like and build your own barbie, which is what stars in Hollywood do, but not normal the women of the world. We need to stop putting other women down to make ourselves feel better. Black women straighten their hair, white women braid their hair when it comes down to it we are alking about hair styles not heirtage which is what we all should all embrace in ourselves
This is mostly for Tina. I find is ridiculing that you have this idea of Black women that portrays them as needing someone to guide them through life. I have natural hair that is very long and thick. If men don’t like what God gave me, that is their problem. And why on earth should I have to wear make-up? Lip gloss is one thing and cleanliness is a give-in but again you seem to want to usurp who I am and create something closer to the all-american european standard. No matter what I do I will not be white. Most babies are born out of wed-lock now days. This is a black problem, this is a people problem. As for your clothing critique, lets just be honest. Most clothes that are advertised and made popular as so because a man came up with it. Over 90% of the fashion designers are men. If you don’t like the trends, take it up with them.
Man dat dere was an ugly collage of images. To answer your question…no! No! HELL NO! Don’t go to the fish shop looking for fresh fish when you live next to fresh water. Don’t get it.
I’m trying to say!! Yet so many are in that looooong line at the fish shop. They aint trying to wade in their own fresh streams, because the man said his photoshop fish was mo’ betta! LOL & SMH
Why do people always stereotype people as looking certain ways. I am an african american women with very little curves. Not every african american have full lips and wide noses. My hair is my own, I donot wear fake hair. My hair is semi curly and flows to my waist
…and all white folks ain’t racist, and all black folks don’t steal. What is your point?
Well, it seems to me, that everything and everybody is mixing up. I mean, black people straighten their hair, they have blond hair. White people are using fake tan. So, what will we have left at the end? I don´t know, I really don´t, I like it different, as myself.
I’m a white male with a black wife. The short answer is no, white women look like idiots even when they’re not trying to steal the noble African good looks and should focus repairing their out of perportion sense of entitlement.
I find white women delusional, self absorbed bitches with very little grasp of reality and what matters in life.
The vast majority of sisters I’ve dated on the other hand were vastly more grounded, self aware (vs Lolas selfconsciouess), self honest, kind and more loyal. No one is perfect, but sisters are better at being a real person and imo, are vastly more attractive, built better and are better lovers as well as better friends. I’m actually completely turned off by white women most of my dumb ass white male peers would trip over them selves to get at.
Sisters, you are beautiful as you are, ditch the wigs, the relaxers and the idea that white women have something you don’t. The opposite is true, you have everything a white woman wishes she had. I’m a good looking white man with sleeve tattoos that all women seem to love. I’ve had all 32 flavors, and by far, chocolate is the Best. And white women are dead last.
I’ve met alot of beautiful white women, filled with a good spirit, and I thank God for it.
Black features look better on blk women.. those fake butts and lips and braids look like crap an too fake on white women..
what’s wrong with weave?